If Zeke were rich... from the mind of Zeke_Wilkins.

This post began as a lunchtime conversation yesterday under the category of "crazy things I'd do to annoy hippies in Eugene if I were a rich guy". It was then circulated to some friends, one of which gave the reply "Post It!" so here goes:

Some possibilities:

* I'd offer to give a $50 million dollar endowment donation if I could have permission to create "The Center for the Advancement of Global Warming" on the U of O campus. Then I'd take out ad space on the local channels and run commercials: "Are you tired of having to bundle up each winter? Has Seasonal Affective Disorder got you down? Then support the research of the Center for the Advancement of Global Warming; we're making the day after tomorrow's dream a reality. Our goal of 80 degrees year-round is well within our technological grasp."

Or,

* I'd run a ballot initiative to exterminate Salmon complete with a hachetjob commercial: "Excrement. Semen. Decomposing corpses. Doesn't sound appealing, does it? But you may have swam in them. Spawning Salmon don't seem so cute anymore do they? Vote YES on initiative 53 and help clean up our local waterways."

Or perhaps,

* I'd just donate that $50 million in exchage for permission to establish a Foundation for the Advancement of Traditional, Conservative, Academic Thought (FATCAT). The building housing the Foundation would be a tribute to the military-industrial complex (whatever that means) and would feature, among other things: a Steakhouse restaurant, a "Dead White Men" library, a "Men's Center", and a indoor pistol range. As a jab to the solar-energy freaks, it would have a device which takes electricity and turns it into artifical solar energy (in other words, broad-spectrum lighting run off fossil fuels or a nuclear reactor we managed to smuggle into the nuclear-free zone). The Foundation would invite prominent neocon speakers to give lectures (where, to make them feel at home, we'd throw pies at them), would host Affirmative Action Bakesales, and of course the ever-popular "Re-Take Back The Night From The Women Who Took Back The Night Last Night Night".

Gosh, I hope I get rich!

Help Pave Eugene! from the mind of Zeke_Wilkins.

I hate having to give personal information in order to make a purchase, so when I'm asked what my zip code is, I have a habit of giving the zip code I had in graduate school: 97403 (for Eugene, Oregon). I guess I've made it an unofficial mission of mine to make sure the good folks of Eugene have the highest per-capita rates of Radio Shacks and Old Navies in the US. I invite all others who hate having to give out information when shopping to join me.

The State Of The League Address from the mind of Zeke_Wilkins.

Fellow Extraordinarily Conservative Gentlemen and Ladies;

Tonight I am proud to report that our vision is clear, our resolve firm, and the state of the League is strong.

As many of you know, there was a semi-impromptu gathering in Eugene to support and congratulate Daredemo on his academic accomplishment. While those unable to attend were missed; the attending members had a wonderful time. The gathering included the ceremonial consumption of red meat and alcohol.

Further good news concerns our blog: we have passed the year and a half marker, have over 18,000 hits, and are approaching 200 posts. Thanks to all who have been posting, and keep up the good work.

Cheers!

Zeke Wilkins' Soulmate? from the mind of Zeke_Wilkins.

During a recent roadtrip with Duke, the writings of Mike Adams on Townhall.com were mentioned. I thought I had read a few of his articles before, but after talking to Duke I thought I should read more of him. On returning home Sunday night I ended up spending several hours reading posts of his - including a seven part series entitled "Why I don't take feminists seriously".

Could Zeke really have a soulmate? For those interested:

Townhall.com and DrAdams.org